No Flow In The Coffee Shop, Please!

Nick Bilton finds that coffee shops are prohibiting computers (and e-readers):

Nick Bilton, No E-Books Allowed in This Establishment

A few weeks ago I decided to mosey over to a local Manhattan coffee shop for an afternoon cappuccino.

After placing my order I sat down at a table and pulled out my Amazon Kindle.

I barely made it a sentence into the e-book I was reading before an employee of the coffee shop came by, stood over me and said, “Excuse me sir, but we don’t allow computers in the coffee shop.”

I looked up at him with an incredulous look and replied, “This isn’t a computer, it’s an e-book reader.”

He then told me that the “device” in my hand had a screen and required batteries, so it was obviously “some variation of a computer.” The coffee shop, I was told, did not allow the use of computers.

Annoyed with this distinction, I peppered the employee with questions on why reading on paper was more acceptable than reading on a screen. Flustered and confused by the existential debate he had been dragged into, the employee resolutely said, “Look, no computers in the coffee shop.”

At face value, the coffee shop owners are trying to push out the freeloaders that occupy a table for three hours after buying an Americano. But I maintain that something more insidious is at work, since they don’t kick you out for reading or listening to music.

They know that you are using the computer — forget the e-reader — to remain connected to the world outside the coffee shop. This is just another oddball version of the war on flow. The restaurants that prohibit phone calls, the Sunday supplement sermons about multitasking, the endless articles telling us to focus on one thing at a time.

I’m not even sure that coffee shops can legally prohibit people from doing specific legal activities, like using a computer. Airlines can do so for supposed safety issues, but what’s the rationale in a coffee shop? 

Imagine a sign at Starbucks saying “No laughing, noon-3pm”, or “Please do not use the bathrooms for putting on make-up”, “Sign language prohibited”, or “Guests are required to keep their elbows off the table.” These would be laughable or blatantly illegal.

My bet is that coffee shops might be able to restrict people from hanging out more than a certain number of hours or minutes, based on loitering regulations, but it is probably illegal to single out people using laptops this way.  Since restaurants are “places of public accommodation” they are subject to equal protection laws, and as a result, they cannot eject people who are using laptops (or ebooks) for occupying tables. This is singling out a certain group of people — like teenagers, or bikers — and that is prohibited by the 14th Amendment as discriminatory. It would be legitimate to chase out freeloaders after some period of time, but it would be necessary to demonstrate that all patrons were treated in the same way. So, if you pull out a laptop while enjoying your latte, and they eject you for doing so, you could sue for damages, and you would likely win. Just my opinion, though.

I think Nick and I should stage a sit-in at one of these establishments, and challenge them in the courts. No discrimination against geeks!